My Story
I went to grad school so I could teach people how to eat well and live well, how to live a nourished life. I fell in love with the science, with the body, mind and spirit puzzle that makes our physiology hum, or falter. And though it was a demanding three years, on graduation I was eager to help everyone stay healthy––just like me, an invincible vegan!
But then, in what seemed a cosmic joke, on graduation, implausibly, I was brought to my knees by a diagnosis of Stage 4 lung cancer.
And there, on my knees, is where my education really began, in the strange and tender land one finds oneself when coming face to face with mortality.
For it was only there, in that dark tunnel, that I would do the work, day by day and moment by moment, to bring my mind–which had lurched into future fears–and my spirit–which had gone into hiding–back into the ‘body, mind and spirit’ totality which is each of us.
And so commenced what I think of as my Post-Graduate Studies in Integrative Health, when I had to integrate everything I had learned on paper–and everything I was learning in my dark tunnel–to become healthy again.
These were studies in Empathy, because….just like that!….I could identify with all those who were suffering, sick, afraid, anxious or ashamed. I was all of those things.
I had a LOT of homework just to get through the day.
Early mornings, QiGong and walks in the woods helped take the edge off my anxiety. Evenings, meditation helped harness my chattering mind. Breathing exercises helped me find sleep and a new stillness. Opening myself to prayer, visualization and ‘radical acceptance’ fed my spirit.
Many loving arms and lovely rituals ultimately lifted me up (along with, crucially, Big Pharma, which...Cosmic Joke #2!....I used to love to hate).
I got my health back, and so much more.
As a result of navigating this turbulence, I am more aware of poignancy of every moment, the beauty and complexity in each of us. This has given me a fuller 'tool box' for emotional, psychological, spiritual and physical health, resources which accompany me to every meeting with every client.
What I know is that now when someone comes to me, I experience in my bones the suffering, great or small, that has brought them to the chair across from me.
Thanks to my ‘post-graduate studies’, I know that we’re in the same human family facing the same challenges.
And I know now that to live a 'nourished' life, a life that is big enough to hold us up through whatever turbulence might be ahead, we need not only to eat well and live well, but to strive to live a life that is spacious and kind, awake and aware.
